9 week scan…

Look how big they are at 9+5!!!

I was so relieved, Will was confident everything was fine but I was just scared that they would scan me and find nothing because of my lack of symptoms.

But there they are!
Both growing exactly how they should be with heart rates of 170 and 171!

We could even see them wriggling about, it was so amazing to see!

Fingers crossed things continue to progress like this!

I have my 12 week scan booked for August 26th, I will update then.
Or before if needed…

What happened between 7 and 9 weeks

Well obviously I worried the whole time and had times where I convinced myself the twins weren’t alive anymore.

The 7th week seems to be the only time I really experienced proper ‘pregnancy’ symptoms.

I felt really sick this week, with the urge to throw up, I didn’t, but thought I might a few times! I still have an aversion to sweet food, though it’s really strong now. Just even looking at cake would make me want to gag! This was really reassuring and probably the only week I felt ‘safe’ because of the symptoms I had.

Once I reached 8 weeks my symptoms eased off again to pretty much nothing, I’d read everywhere that twin pregnancies usually cause much more extreme pregnancy symptoms, but I was feeling fine so of course that made me worry again.

And I had to stop the pessaries now, so I was worried that I would come on my period and it would all be over. It all just felt to good to be true that I was still just waiting for something to go wrong. I desperately want to be able to enjoy this pregnancy but I just can’t seem to stop worrying!

I’m a bundle of joy I know!

Sure enough, I didn’t come on my period and finally the scan came around at 9 weeks 5 days.
Read the next post to see how I got on…

7 week scan!

LOOK!!!

I’m officially really pregnant!
I couldn’t believe it was really true, and with not 1 but 2!

We were soooo happy, we could see their little heatbeats, it was such an incredible feeling I can’t even describe it!

Twin B is obviously a little shy but we could still see the heartbeats.

The clinic were happy with everything and we were discharged from their care and passed onto my GP.

I was told to stop the pessaries at 8 weeks and then I would be free from any artificial hormones to help me to support the pregnancy, then it would be all down to me!

I have booked another scan for 9 weeks because I obviously can’t wait until 12 weeks!

Read my next post to see how I coped from now to the 9 week scan!

Leading up to the 7 week scan

God being pregnant is stressful!
Especially an IVF pregnancy! After 3 failures I felt like I was just waiting for something to go wrong all the time!
I took test after test after test because I would convince myself daily that I wasn’t pregnant anymore and the progesterone pessaries was just stopping me from coming on my period.

Sure enough each test was positive, but that would only ease my mind for a few hours! And if I compared the test to older ones and it wasn’t considerably darker I would convince myself it was all going wrong, god I wish I could have just slept right through til the 7 week scan! I was driving everyone around me crazy, let alone myself!

In regards to symptoms, I didn’t really have many.
Which was also making me panic, obviously!
I felt a little more tired than usual, and had gone off sweet food, but other than that I felt pretty normal!

Only our family members and closest friends (who knew about IVF) knew that I was pregnant, and of course my work!

Anyway, about a decade later scan day came…
Read my next post to see what happened!

Coming home from hospital

Oh I was so glad to be going home!
Mostly because I really needed to catch up on sleep, hospitals are very noisy places!
But also because I wanted to see a familiar face! I wasn’t allowed any visitors in hospital due to the pandemic so it was very lonely!

My mum picked me up and took me back with her and Will picked me up when he finished work and we went home.

It was good to be home!

I got straight into bed, propped myself right up with lots of pillows, put netflix on and fell straight to sleep.

That is until about 11pm when I woke up and had stomach cramps that were absolute agony at the top of my stomach!

I called my mum for help because she always knows what I should do, I’d already had gaviscon which wasn’t working. She told me to get on all fours on the floor and fully relax my stomach and see if that helps to ease it.

I got on the floor and was crying in agony, Will was telling me he’s taking me back to hospital and I was like WAIT JUST WAIT, I did not want to go back there unless I really had to.

After around 10 minutes of being on the floor in all sorts of strange postitions the cramps did subside and oh my god I was so relieved for it to have gone away.

No lie that was probably one of the most painful experiences I’ve ever had!

I continued to have cramps until my stomach went down a lot, but that night was by far the worst!

I spent every day at my mums and dads house whilst Will worked so I didn’t have to be on my own, just taking a few steps was such an effort. I was still struggling to stand up straight because of the pain and wasn’t eating very much, but I did start to slowly improve and by the week after I was able to walk standing upright and was eating much better.

Though only recently have I been able to lie down and sleep on my side without any pain. It took a really long time for things to settle, but Dr’s said they would!

All I hope is that it will all be worth it!

Another waaaay over due update! (OHSS)

I have my reasons for leaving it so long…
But I will get to that later, for now I’ll pick up from where I left off.

So post embryo transfer everything seemed to be going fine, for about 4 days…

4 days past transfer I was working and began to bloat. Like, really really bloat. I had stomach ache right up under my ribs, but I had this for a few days after egg collection so just assumed it was everything still settling down.

Nope. Things just continued to get worse.

By 6dpt (days past transfer) I was in a lot of pain in my tummy and so so bloated it was painful to stand up straight or lie down.
I had read online that when showing symptoms of OHSS Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome to drink lots of lucozade/gatorade for the electrolytes and sodium. (Electrolytes to keep you hydrated and sodium to help keep the fluid in your veins where it’s supposed to be rather than leaking out into your abdomen) .
Well I drank around 3 litres of lucozade and I’d only pee’d like twice throughout the whole day and my pee was quite dark.

At around 9pm we decided to call the out of hour GP at the clinic for advise as I was in a lot of pain and concerned that I wasn’t peeing much but had drank a lot.
The GP advised I go to a&e to be checked over, so Will took me over but due to the pandemic was unable to stay with me so he dropped me off.

I had some bloods taken and they said I would have to wait an hour for the results then could probably be sent home.
Luckily a&e was quiet because I was having the most agonising stomach cramps, I was pacing around and probably looked like I was having a nervous break down (I probably was) so glad I didn’t have a large audience!

The gynae doctor called me through and said my bloods have shown that I’m really dehydrated due to all the fluid leaking out of my veins into my body, she said I would need to stay in overnight and have an ultrasound in the morning, then probably would be okay to go home.

Well, my first ever overnight hospital stay was strange!
I was in a&e waiting for a bed til 2am, then even once I was admitted to the ward we had to continue to wear face masks until covid tests came back, sleeping with a face mask on was horrid! The only bonus was being in a hospital bed meant I could sit my self right up to sleep as lying down was much too painful!

10am I the next day I had my ultrasound which showed I had lots of free fluid in my abdomen which confirmed the OHSS, I had lots more bloods taken, including a hcg test and had to wait for the Dr to come around and see me in the afternoon.

I spent the day on the bed, crying in pain and feeling sorry for myself. Also worried about the hcg test because I don’t think I felt ready to take another negative just yet. I wasn’t really able to eat anything because my stomach felt so full I felt sick all the time, and was just having sips of water to try and stay hydrated.

That afternoon the Dr came over to see me, she explained that according to the ultrasound I have moderate OHSS but my blood results tip me into severe because my electrolytes, sodium, proteins etc were all depleted. And because of all the fluid leaking into my body this made my blood very thick and sticky so I had to start on Fragmin injections (blood thinners) which feel like you’re being injected with fire btw!!!

I just burst into tears, good job I had a face mask on because I was definitely ugly crying!

But there was a positive, literally, I was PREGNANT!
I’d spoken to the clinic as they wanted an update, they told me it was highly likely I was pregnant as OHSS symptoms are usually brought on by the hcg hormone, so urged me to take a test.
Will bought me a test over and I went back up to the ward to take it, and straight away it showed up positive!
I couldn’t believe it!
I facetimed Will straight away and we both cried it seemed so surreal!
Blood tests confirmed the pregnancy, my beta came back at 187!
I was so shocked, we weren’t meant to test til Wednesday and it was only Saturday, 7dpt! Though overjoyed and nervous and scared and anxious and everything else because worrying is just what I do.

A strong positive!!!

Because of my bloods they had to keep me in again and was told I had to pee into a cardboard tray everytime I go so they can measure how much I’m drinking and how much is coming back out. They were also weighing me and measuring the girth of my tummy daily. Oh and I had to wear those lovely green stockings to prevent blood clots!

That evening I had started to get chest pain under my left rib.
The Dr came to see me and said I would need to have a chest x-ray to make sure I didn’t have a blood clot on my lungs, as OHSS puts you at a higher risk of blood clots.
They said they would ensure none of the radiation of the x-ray would be directed at my tummy, as x-rays aren’t advised during pregnancy.

At midnight I was woken up for the x-ray, then went back up to the ward.
I was then woken up at 4am by the Dr who said my x-ray showed there was no sign of a blood clot on my lung but she was still concerned about my chest pain. She tooks lots more bloods from me to check if I would test positive for a blood clot (apparently they can check your blood for the likelihood of a blood clot) and then come back to see me in the morning.

Well in the morning the nurse woke me up to tell me she needed to canulate me ready for a CT scan.
I was like noooo I can’t have a CT I’m pregnant and I haven’t heard anything about this.
She told me she would ask the Dr to come and see me before she puts a cannula in.
About an hour later the Dr came and said my bloods came back positive for a potential blood clot (but she said that could be because I’m pregnant) so I needed to have a CT scan to make sure I don’t. If I don’t have the CT scan she said I could end up having a stroke! She also said the radiation is a risk to the pregnancy, but it’s no more than flying to Australia which some people do at this stage in pregnancy, they would also sheild my tummy to help protect the embryo(s) from any radiation damage.
I was so upset that I was going through this whilst just finding out I was pregnant but knew I just had to roll with it and hope that it would all be worth it.

On a positive note my hcg levels had risen to 297 in less than 48 hours, yaaaaay!

I had the CT scan, which is sooooo strange! Everything goes hot and it feels like you’re peeing yourself!
I seen the Dr who said there are no blood clots (thank god) but I do have lots of fluid in my tummy which has now gone onto my left lung, which is what’s causing me the pain.

So not great news, but at least no blood clots!

Anyway, this has dragged on waaaay too long so I’ll try speed it up.
I stayed in another night for monitoring and my weight and girth of my tummy stayed the same. They were happy that as long as I wasn’t getting worse I could go home to recover.
They signed me off work for 3 weeks and said I need to continue the fragmin injections until the 12th week of pregnancy.

See my next post for an update on going home.

Embryo transfer no.4

I need to update from my last post as I’m behind agaaaaaain…

So we had a call from the embryologist the day after egg collection who said they attempted fertilisation with all 14 eggs, and 13 have been successfully fertilised which was great news.

They then called me again on Thursday and said 10 were doing well, and out of those 10 5 were look very good so they booked embryo transfer for Saturday 20th at 9.30am.

I don’t know what it is, but I always manage to go completely overboard with the full bladder situation!
Everytime!
(You have to have a full bladder for embryo transfer)
With a fresh transfer is actually quite painful as you’re still sore from egg collection, swollen ovaries etc.

The few days after egg collection weren’t great, I was really sore and swollen/bloated. The clinic said this can be normal but to let them know if I started vomiting/have trouble breathing/if the bloating gets worse.
I drank loads of water and lucozade for the electrolytes (supposed to help with hydration) and ate plenty of salty foods (supposed to help with excess fluid causing bloat)
and the pain and bloating got much better!

I’ve got to be honest, I’m not convinced with this embryo transfer.
After having 3 previously, I know what to expect and what to look for on the scan during the procedure and from where my ovaries were still so swollen and my bladder so full everything was squashing my uterus.
Like you could hardly see it at all!
It looked TINY.
Before I could always see it very clearly and could see the catheter in there but this time it was a real struggle to see anything, even the nurse was trying to reposition the scanner to try and get a better picture.
We did see a tiny flash on the screen as they transferred 2 grade A blastocysts, but, I don’t know, I’m not feeling too confident.
Not that I ever do!

Well, it’s all just a waiting game now.
And to carry on with these horrible progesterone pessaries.

I’ll let you know how I’m doing in a few days!

Egg collection

Sorry, I know this is a late update again!
I have no excuse other than being lazy.
So this is from nasal sprays right through to today which is egg collection.

I had a scan on June 2nd following about 2.5 weeks on nasal sprays to check my ovaries were sleeping and lining was thin.
Everything was as they wanted, so I was given instruction to start injections on June 4th, which just so happened to be my birthday!

So June 4th I started the menopur 600 injections. These were a bit more complicated than the gonal-f I used last time. Gonal-f comes in like a pen and all you have to do is screw a needle on, dial up the correct dosage and you’re good to go. Menopur you have to inject the solution into this bottle of powder, wait for it to dissolve then use a new needle to draw the correct dose into the syringe you’re using to inject yourself.
For anyone wondering what the difference is between gonal-f and menopur; gonal-f is just FSH (follicle stimulating hormone) on it’s own. Menopur is a blend of FSH and LH (Luteinizing Hormone) which is supposed to help produce better quality eggs.

The menopur injections weren’t as ‘nice’ to inject as gonal-f either. Needles were longer and I think less sharp. So when injecting, it was just pushing my skin instead of peircing it, which was quite painful.
Ice was a godsend!

I then had a scan on June 10th to check how my follicles were doing. They counted 26 follicles, some were too big, some too small. They decided to keep my dose the same as not many follicles were of decent size yet. They like the follicles to be at least 1.8cm before triggering for egg collection.

I had another scan June 12th where they counted 35 follicles and told me I was borderline high risk for OHSS (Ovarian Hyper Stimulation Syndrome) and depending on how many eggs are collected, they may have to freeze everything and let me have a period before doing embryo transfer to reduce risk of OHSS. They said any more than 25 eggs collected would lead to freezing all embryos and doing a FET (frozen embryo transfer) instead.
So then obviously I was worried, mostly because I’m capable somehow of worrying about absolutely nothing, but also because our fresh transfer previously was the only one that ended up with a positive pregnancy test (even though I ended up losing the pregnancy) and all our FET’s were negatives. So we were hanging onto a fresh transfer being our only hope of a winner. And also I didn’t want to end up with OHSS!

Anyway, they told me to do my trigger shot of Ovitrelle on June 13th and 20:10 ready for egg collection on June 15th at 08:10.

So this morning we were up at 6am ready to head over to Oxford.

They done all there checks then sent me off to sleep to collect whatever eggs I had and Will had the wonderful job of producing a sample!

When I came around they told me they have collected 14 eggs, which was great news!
We were okay to go ahead for a fresh embryo transfer on Saturday, yaaaaaay!

Just waiting for a call from them tomorrow on how many eggs were successfully fertilised!

Treatment has commenced!

Much earlier than we all thought too!
Thought I would atleast have a treatment free birthday this year, but I can’t moan!

I had a phone call on May 14th from clinic to ask what cycle day I was on, I was on day 20. As treatment for a fresh cycle starts on day 21, they said I could start on May 15th if I could go and pick up the nasal spray. So Will went and picked them up from Oxford on the 15th and I started them that evening, I will have to have 2 sprays twice a day for 3 weeks.

The nasal spray is different to the one I used last time. The one I used before was Buserelin, this one is called Synarel.

And let me tell you, this one is turning me into a full blown crazy woman!
Like the worst side effects I have ever experienced from any IVF medication!

When I used Buserelin the only side effects I had were night terrors and headaches.

I mean physically I’m not experiencing many side effects from Synarel other than sore boobs.
But mentally I’ve been struggling!

The rage I am getting is something else.
The smallest thing is making my blood boil.
The most minor of inconveniences is causing me to rage big time!

The sound of our dogs claws ticking on the laminet floor, Will chewing/swallowing too loudly, being hungry, the smallest amount of traffic, just people, EVERYTHING is annoying me.

I have a scan booked on June 10th, I pray I get used to this nasal spray soon and mellow out because even me being annoyed is annoying me!

Anyone else really irritable when using Synarel???

A waaaay overdue update!!!

First off, sorry I haven’t posted in so long!
We have been so busy, with moving house, I got a new job as a care coordinator/supervisor (which is so different to what I’m used to!) then with all this coronavirus malarkey time has just ran away from me.

Last time I posted I was due to have an appointment to discuss our treatment plan. Well we had that appointment at the beginning of March which went really well, they were happy with all of our blood results etc. I had an internal scan as well just to make sure everything looks okay.


I was actually due on at the time, but the nurse said she couldn’t see any signs of ovulation this month 😦
That was a bit confusing for me, as whenever I have had scans when I’m due on before they can always see that I’ve ovulated.

In case any of you are wondering how you can see on a scan whether or not you’ve ovulated, depending on which ovary you ovulated from, there will be what’s called a corpus luteum on one of your ovaries. The nurses usually describe it as a cobweb. It is where you have ovulated, and it secretes the hormone progesterone to support a possible pregnancy.
Interesting huh?

Anyway, the nurse said it looks as though I hadn’t ovulated. She said my right ovary was looking polycystic.
I was like what do you mean?!?
And she said poly just means lots, and I had lots of follicles on my right ovary. (About 12) She said I probably didn’t ovulate because I have so many follicles that were all fighting against each other to produce an egg, and none of them won.
She says it’s normal for that to happen sometimes for someone my age?

Other than that, they were happy for us to commence treatment after my period arrived. I was due to start on the nasal sprays on day 21.

My period came and went, we were waiting for medication to be delivered.
Then of course they called to say treatment will be cancelled until this pandemic is all over. So that’s where we’re at, just waiting til all this blows over.

Will got laid off, and as he had only been self employed for just under 1 year he doesn’t get any pay at all. Luckily, I am still working as I’m a keyworker. So my income is our only income.

Hopefully this will all be over soon and we can all go back to some sort of normality.

Hope you’re all well!
Stay safe everyone, and I promise to update more regular!
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