35 weeks – c section date

As I am sitting here writing this, we have exactly 11 days until our c-section date.
15/02/2021

I am so excited to meet them, but I have to be honest I feel sick to my stomach everytime I think about that c-section.

I am so scared. I’ve never had any kind of surgery before, apart from egg collection haha!
I know I will be numb but the recovery is what scares me the most. I am a complete wuss when it comes to pain. And to think I will be in pain and need someone around 24/7 to help with passing me the babies and getting out of bed etc makes me anxious. I like to be able to do everything myself.

What also scares me is having to lie on my back for the c-section. I genuinely cannot breathe when I’m on my back and feel like I will pass out. I don’t know what I will be like having to be completely flat on my back for the procedure! But they do this day in, day out, they know what they’re doing I just need to try and stop my mind from going into overdrive!

I can’t believe how quickly this pregnancy has flown by. I have less than 2 weeks left! But then I suppose if I was going full term, I would have another 5-7 weeks to go!
I don’t know if I’m ready not to be pregnant anymore! I’ve loved being pregnant so much and feeling them move and getting used to having a big belly, its going to feel really strange when they’re not in there anymore. I just know I will miss it so much.

I have another growth scan booked for February 8th, fingers crossed they are continuing to gain some weight!

Admitted to hospital

So at 34+4 I noticed again that movements were very quiet. This time from both babies, I wasn’t feeling much of anything. I had felt the odd subtle movement here and there, but that was it. Definitely nothing like their usual movements.

As soon as Will got home from work we went straight in, with their weights being low I was more nervous than last time.
Though a part of me felt a bit silly! I kept thinking to myself that it will just be typical that I go in there, they both start moving and CTG is fine and then I look like a drama queen!
At the same time, I knew I was doing the right thing, which is exactly what I have been told to do. I wasn’t prepared to just leave it and take the risk. I would never forgive myself if something was wrong and I didn’t do anything about it.

Again, they monitored me for a while. But movements still hadn’t picked up at all. They were still very quiet. It was reassuring that the CTG showed 2 seperate heartbeats. But becuase the movements were still very quiet, they decided I should stay in for monitoring overnight and in the morning, along with a scan in the morning to check the blood flow to the babies.

So I had to stay in 😦

They also chose to give me steroid injections (dexamethasone) to mature the babies lungs, just in case they do need to come out early.
SCARY!!!
And these injections are SO painful!
I had 1 in each thigh, 12 hours apart and it feels like it sends your whole leg into cramp. Not pleasant!

Well the overnight stay wasn’t the best of course, due to covid I had to keep my mask on until my swab results were back, and hospitals in general are really noisy. It’s just not possible to get a good night sleep in there, even though I was in a side room!
And it was like an absolute sauna in there, never been so hot and sweaty in all my life!

Anyway, I had a scan in the morning from one of the consultants who specialises in high risk pregnancies and complex cases, as well as twin pregnancies. He was really happy with the scan, they have both gained some weight again. Estimated weight for baby boy was 4lb 1 and baby girl was 4lb 3, which is amazing! So reassuring!
He also said that baby girl has moved head down! I cannot believe it! This whole pregnancy she has been breech and he was head down. Now he is breech and she is head down! I don’t know how she found the room to move but she did, somehow!

Once we had the scan and they were happy with their blood flow and weight gain I was discharged again, with the plan to see the consultant on Monday 1st of Feb, then another growth scan on Monday 8th of Feb.

Hopefully I won’t have any more reduced movement from here on and I can enjoy these final weeks of pregnancy, stress free.

Bumpdate ❤

34 week scan update

Our 34 week scan showed both babies weights are on the low side. Baby boys estimated weight was 3lb 6 and baby girls was 3lb 8. So they were both starting to slow down in regards to weight gain.

They had also noticed that baby girls abdominal circumferance had dropped off a little. When I saw the midwife after my scan, she explained this may be a concern as it can mean that the baby is struggling and prioritising the brain rather than the weight gain.

Obviously this made me panic!

She went away to discuss my scan with a consultant and were indecisive about what to do. They were going to send me into hospital for further checks (not sure what further checks meant), but they then decided that going from my previous scan both babies were still gaining weight. Just very slowly.

So the plan is to continue as we are, with another scan at 36 weeks to check their growth again.

I came away not feeling very reassured. But trusted they know what they’re doing and to just continue to be mindful of their movements.

We didn’t get any pictures printed this time, not that you can see what’s what anymore anyway!

A little scare…

So, we had a growth scan at 32 weeks which showed baby boy was starting to slow down on the weight gain a little. They weren’t too concerned at this stage. They asked me about their movements. I said that they are usually active but they do have quiet days sometimes. My midwife told me there is no such thing as a quiet day, babies should be moving around the same amount each day and as soon as I notice they’re quiet I should be calling them and going in to be monitored.

So this scared me a little I think, and made me then overthink their movements entirely. I felt like all I could do was focus on them and their movements and was questioning whether the amount of movement was normal for them or not. Especially with baby boy’s weight gain having slowed, this made me even more vigilant on their movements.

At 33+4 on January 22nd, I noticed when I woke up that morning that they were being a little ‘quiet’. They are usually quite active first thing in the morning so I knew straight away I needed to pay attention to them today. But not much changed all day, I had definitely felt movement, more so movements on my left where baby boy is, but no where near as much as usual and I definitely couldn’t feel any movements from baby girl that I could make out.

I decided once I had tea to sit quietly and give them a chance to perk up, this is another time of day when they’re usually very active. But still not uch movement at all. I rang the maternity unit at the hospital who told me to come in for monitoring.

For about an hour they were struggling to find 2 different heartbeats. It just kept flashing up as coincidence on the screen, saying the heartbeats were identical and cannot confirm there are 2 seperate heart beats. We were so genuinely worried, my mind started to go into overdrive and I began thinking the worst.

Luckily, they eventually decided to scan me to find both heartbeats and thank god they were both beating away! Baby girl was just in a different position to what we thought and that was why we were struggling to pick it up.

We stayed and were monitored for a while, and of course the movements then began to pick up. Whether it was my adrenaline when they couldn’t find 2 heartbeats I dont know, but it just seems so typical to spend all day having reduced movement, then going in ot be monitored and they then decide to wake up!

Either way, the most important this is they were okay and happy with the monitoring. We were then sent home. They decided to move our next scan forward to 34 weeks instead of 36 to monitor their growth more closely.

This was of course after they found 2 seperate heart beats and we knew everything was okay! We were not smiling before lol.

4D scan

I forgot to mention, we had our 4D scan at 25 weeks!
Top picture is baby girl, bottom picture is baby boy.

Baby girl ❤
Baby boy ❤

It was so surreal to see these little babies on the screen, when they’re actually inside my tummy! I can’t get over how amazing and incredible and blessed I feel to be carrying, growing, nurturing and protecting these babies. To be their vessel to life, the very thing to give them life.
I’ve never felt more proud than to know that my body is able to create 2 incredible teeny human beings. With a tiny weeny teeny bit of help from Will, haha!

Hello third trimester!

Can’t believe I’m sat here writing this to be honest!
Third trimester!
28 weeks pregnant, with twins!

I don’t think it will ever fully sink in until they’re actually here!

What’s been happening…

So from 20 weeks I have been seeing my consultant or midwife alternately every 2 weeks, with a growth scan every 4 weeks. We have to do this because twin pregnancies are higher risk because of the strain it has on the mothers body, also to make sure there isn’t a greedy twin taking all the goods and leaving the other without. Though we’re at lower risk for a greedy twin as they both have their own placentas. So far they’ve been happy with the twins growth and movements are definitely getting stronger.

I have found I have struggled a lot with breathlessness, and it seems to be aaaaall the time! No matter what I’m doing I always feels as though I’m not getting enough oxygen, which is horrible! I mentioned this to my consultant who done some bloods which showed my iron levels had dropped a little again since last time, even though I am taking iron tablets twice a day. Because of this, and the fact I am symptomatic she decided for me to have an iron infusion. I have to say it has definitely helped, I still do feel a little breathless but it’s not as debilitating as it was.

Round ligament pain has settled down now which is loooovely! Nice not to feel like I have a permanent stitch!

And now all I do is eat, and eat, and eat. Then eat some more. I’m an absolute pig.

I have to say though, I love being pregnant! I love watching my belly grow, I love feeling them move, I just love everything about it, the nice and the unpleasant symptoms. I know that it’s unlikely I will ever experience this again, so I am just embracing it all and cherishing every moment.

Bumpdate ❤

20 week scan + movements!

Look at those adorable little toes!!!

I was so nervous for this scan! I’ve always seen the 20 week scan as the scariest one. Just because if there is something wrong, now is likely to be when they find it, and obviously with it being an IVF pregnancy we’re at higher risk for there to be anomolies found.

The scan took quite a while and was really in depth. They had a good look at everything, from all there organs, the placenta and blood flow, to the fluid surrounding them. Everything.
Thank the lord the sonographer and my consultant was happy with the twins growth and their health! I felt so reasssured to get past the 20 week scan with no concerns/issues found, I might finally be able to relax a little and enjoy this pregnancy now!

Well, probably not, but we can dream.

Anyway, the most exciting milestone throughout this pregnancy. The best one of all.
I felt them move ❤
I was 17+2 and using the doppler when I saw a tiny little flick on my stomach. Initially I didn’t think anything of it, but then it happened again and I felt it inside. Like a little bubble popping. Oh my when I tell you I damn near cried! Once I had felt and seen them move this was all I wanted to do. All day, everyday, just sit and watch my belly and concentrate on their movements. Such an amazing, surreal feeling that I know I will miss so much when they are here.

Bumpdate ❤

GENDER REVEAL

At the start of pregnancy I was convinced I was carrying 2 boys. I had multiple dreams of carrying 2 boys and having 2 baby boys, so I was completely convinced.

We always said we don’t mind what we have, as long as they’re both healthy that’s all that matters. We just really wanted to know, I think it’s so hard to prepare for having 2 babies not knowing their genders!

At 16+5 we paid for a private scan, we couldn’t wait until our 20 week scan.
Plus it meant I got to see them again so it was a good excuse to have a scan!

Unfortunately because of coronavirus we weren’t able to have a gender reveal party or anything 😦

As the sonographer was having a look at twin 1, we guessed it straight away.
There was no mistaking that twin 1 is a BOY <3.

When she started scanning twin 2, I felt a bit scared. I just kept thinking ‘I hope this one’s a girl’. I just thought it would be the perfect outcome and that would be IVF over and done with. Because I think if I was to have 2 boys I would always want to try again for a girl, I have always wanted a girl!

And well what do you know?
Twin 2 is a GIRL <3!

The most amazing outcome for us.

Just perfect. Such precious little babies and we feel so blessed to be having one of each!

Pregnancy symptoms during first trimester

I have been so so so lucky so far in this pregnancy in regards to symptoms!
I have read it’s really common to suffer more with morning sickness, fatigue etc in a twin pregnancy more than you would with a singleton.

But I genuinely have had no real sickness what so ever. I haven’t actually threw up once throughout this pregnancy yet, and I will be 14 weeks on Monday!

So lets go from the very start –

4 – 7 weeks
I just felt more sleepy than usual, though nothing dramatic. And the fatigue may have also had something do with being unwell/recovering from ohss so I can’t pin all the tiredness to pregnancy.
I also had A LOT of cramping. Which made me so so nervous, I felt like I was going to bleed at any time and it would all be game over. This was the scariest time and mentally I struggled, I was just so scared and even convinced it would all go wrong. I spent all my time on google reading through forums searching for some reassurance! I had seen failure 3 times previously and now that I was finally really pregnant it felt all that more scary to lose it all. I kept taking pregnancy tests and digitals in an attempt to reassure myself and checking line progression – which sometimes helped til the next day or my next cramp!

At 7 weeks we had our first scan at the IVF clinic, which reassured me so much (though not for long).


7-9 weeks
I felt nauseous quite a lot, but only with foods! I had really strong food aversions and went off anything and everything sweet! Even looking at cake or chocolate made me want to gag!
Also foods tasted different, I usually love broccoli but that made me feel really sick. I was eating cottage pie one night and the taste almost made me sick, which is a meal I would usually love!
I had also been really bloated come the evenings by 8 weeks, I looked pregnant but it definitely wasn’t a baby belly it was just bloating and the amount of food I’d eaten!
The most draining symptom I have had is being starving aaaaall the time, especially whilst being so picky! Like I’m hungry but everything is making me feel sick!

Weeks 9 – 13
All my symptoms settled gradually, even though I didn’t have much in the first place! The only thing that hasn’t really gone away is the bloating and the constant hunger.
The nausea has completely gone away, and although I’m still not all that keen on sweet food it doesn’t make me gag now. I have eaten the odd piece of chocolate/cake but don’t eat it anywhere near as much as I used to, I just don’t fancy it.
The only things that make me gag now are brushing my teeth and horrible smells! Sorry but I can’t even deal with the food waste bin. It’s a no from me.
I still haven’t been sick, but if I was it would be because of these not because I feel sick.

Now
My newest symtpoms have been a craving for sour foods, unripe blackberries are my favourite! Also roast potatoes and graaaaavy!
Also shortness of breath/no energy.
I literally can’t do anything at all without getting out of breath. Just standing up off the sofa makes me out of breath, drying my hair the other day I had to stop and lie on the bed cause I felt so out of breath and energy!

But honestly, other than the lack of energy when I do anything, I feel absolutely fine!
I’ve been having lots of stretching/growing pains this week.
We also got given a doppler by my sister-in-law and we’ve been listening to their heartbeats every night, which is hugely reassuring when I’m worried about the pain I’m having. I also just love to hear them and use it even if I’m not worried!

Also I have actually lost half a stone during the first trimester to my surprise!
Considering I have had no sickness and have been constantly hungry, I have lost weight. Though I read online that apparently in a twin pregnancy you can lose weight in the first trimester because your body is working so hard to grow the babies and their placentas!

Will update again after I have seen the consultant on Monday!

First trimester screening results

I haven’t really been thinking much about this to be honest!

But when the letter came through I felt really nervous! Will rang me whilst I was driving home from work and said I had a letter and do I want him to open it.

I was like nooooooo that’ll be the screening results let me open it, but he wasn’t going to be there when I got home so we bickered about who was going to open it!

So I said he can open it but don’t tell me anything and I’ll read it when I get home, but he read it to me anyway -_-

Luckily, the results were low risk for all the test and both babies!

I wasn’t really expecting anything different, I just didn’t have that feeling something would be wrong. But I still got scared when it came to reading the results!

So relieved all is fine though, next appointment is with the consultant on September 7th. Will update then!